Messy, Fun and Shockingly Real

Selling Sunset’s first reunion, which followed the borderline unwatchable Season 5, was a lot better than most expected. Chrishell Stause opened up about her then-new relationship with non-binary Australian rapper G Flip. Jason Oppenheim cried over his ex Stause, convincing us that their short-lived romance wasn’t just a play for ratings. (This was before we knew that Jason’s slept with almost every hot, female realtor he’s hired.) Former cast member Maya Vander made meme-worthy faces. Heather Rae Al Moussa even lost her Oreo virginity.

If that reunion was a surprise success, the Season 7 reunion proves that these postseason gatherings should be mandatory events. It certainly helps that Season 7 was actually good; between Chrishell finally stepping into her bitchier side and Nicole Young dividing the group, the women were willing to get down and dirty in a way we haven’t seen since Christine Quinn’s departure. And during the 80-minute reunion on Wednesday, they delivered the same level of attitude, honesty, and occasional vulnerability.

First, let’s start with the revelations that literally made my jaw drop—the main one being that Michael B. Jordan’s dick is allegedly trash. This was revealed by none other than Bre Tiesi during a random-yet-fruitful segment where the cast answered salacious questions while hooked to a polygraph. (Thanks, Vanity Fair?)

During the season, Tiesi let it slip that she had previously hooked up with Jordan. Later, in an interview with Entertainment Tonight, she claimed that she wasn’t aware they were filming when she said it. However, the cameras didn’t seem to bother the realtor when host Tan France inquired about their sexual encounter at the reunion. When asked if the Creed star was good in bed, Tiesi confidently responded “No,” followed by some telling laughter. Jordan has yet to respond to this claim.

During this lie-detector segment, we also learned that Jason is still in love with Chrishell, which I guess will make for an interesting storyline next season. France also asked the broker if he hooked up with any of the other realtors, aside from Nicole, Chrishell, and Mary Fitzgerald, which he denied. For whatever reason—maybe Jason forgot—the polygraph results agreed with his statement. But thankfully, Chelsea Lazkani declared it was inaccurate.

So who’s the fourth (as far as we know) Oppenheim Group employee Jason’s shagged? Drumroll, please: Amanza Smith! This news isn’t really shocking, as the two have had a decades-spanning, close friendship. There was even a moment this season where Amanza recounted watching Jason powder his balls on his balcony that suggests, if not affirms, that these people have gotten intimate at one point. Still, good for Smith for keeping this hookup a secret for this long.

Elsewhere in the reunion, Chrishell and Nicole address their exhausting beef, which started in Season 6 over a years-old commission. Nicole’s pissed about Chrishell saying she “rearranged her face” for the show. (On a Los Angeles-set show where everyone has fake boobs and wears 50 pounds of makeup, I don’t think this is the lowest of blows.) Meanwhile, Chrishell’s upset about a homophobic Instagram comment Nicole responded to. The user wrote, in part, “get that lesbian chick off the show,” referring to Chrishell. They ended it by complimenting Nicole, who replied, “Thank you!”

Nicole—who’s either 37 or 53, according to Google—said she didn’t understand how the user’s reference to Chrishell’s sexuality (who doesn’t identify as a lesbian) was wrong. Half of the cast, including France and Jason, have to explain to Nicole an extremely slow speed that the commenter used “lesbian chick” pejoratively. Lankazi adds that responding positively to any part of the comment made it look like she was tolerating the person’s homophobia. Nicole looks like the math-lady GIF as she’s receiving this information initially but claims to understand how prejudice works by the end of the segment.

Chrishell also has some things to settle with Amanza, who the internet seems to agree was at fault for their tiff this season. Even though they made up during the finale, they had a subsequent fallout over the payment for G Flip’s recording studio. Amanza was hired—then fired—to design the space after she pissed off Chrishell. Apparently, the money Chrishell offered Amanza for the work she already performed (a mood board and a sofa purchase) was only half of what Amanza thought she deserved. While they don’t come to an agreement over the pay, they thankfully decide to bury the hatchet anyway.

As if this reunion needed more drama, a few of the Selling the O.C. cast members—including Polly Brindle, Alex Hall, Brandi Marshall, and Gio Helou–dropped by with a sneak peek of Season 8. Alex also hints that her showmance with Tyler Stanaland ended badly (shocker). Unfortunately, France didn’t get into Amanza’s disdain for Alex, who she said she “couldn’t stand” when the Orange County realtor appeared on this season of Selling Sunset. The Alex Hall haters, which is most of the internet at this point, would’ve loved to see these two go at it.

Still, France was a more than effective and refreshingly empathetic host. While he seemed slightly uncomfortable wearing his Andy Cohen hat the first go-round, his delivery at this reunion was a lot smoother, segueing between silly, serious, and shady moments with confidence and ease. And thankfully, the cast was down to answer any and all questions. While Bravo has set the bar for reality TV reunions over the years, the Selling Sunset realtors proved that you don’t need screaming matches or walk-offs to give viewers a good time.

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